The Mind Of a Cool Kid

I came across this blog by accident and I enjoyed my visit so I blogged it.
The Mind Of a Cool Kid

Shift Changes

I have noticed a shift change within this weekend. I celebrated my birthday with friends and loved ones. Someone close to me has also changed. I have been noticing little things that can be disputed but my instincts say they are what they are...

I wonder,
what goes through your mind
when you gaze at me?
When you focus on your inner thoughts?
I stare,
trying to gather as much as I can
from your gaze
but you only allow me to peer
at your aloofness,
your nonchalant demeanor.
I am puzzled,
unsure of what action to take...

Life As It Is

I had so much fun yesterday and I hadn't done anything you can call extraordinary. I spent my birthday the way I wanted to: communicating with friends and family. Simplicity is my key. Feeling appreciated for just being me is fuel for my spirit. People I haven't spoken to in months emailed or called to wish me a happy birthday...

Life As It Is

Life is yours.
Do with it what you will.
Me,
I like things simple,
straight to the point.
Work, love and live.
That's how I want my life to play out.
Life is what it is.
If you let it slip by
then its gone
there are no refunds or exchanges.
All sales are final.
Like that favorite item in your closet.
Do you let it collect dust
or do you wear the threads out of it?
Me, I will wear the threads out of my life
until my time is up
because
my life
as it is now
is beautiful like a garden of violets
but I want to add peonies
and lillies for more beauty...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ME!!!

I am young, gorgeous and creative and today I am loving life!

The Sky is the Limit

Feeling down with head bowed
and discouraged at best
because life has thrown curveballs
putting you to the test;
don't give up on yourself
take another shot,
look your fear in the eye
and give it all you got.
You can be what you want
if you put your heart in it.
Whatever you want
you can be
because the sky is the limit.

Frustrated

Frustrated,
because I work hard
to care for boys
who are treated like pawns
in your childish games.
I am frustrated
because
you show more concern
for tax kickbacks
than
providing a roof
to protect their heads.
I am frustrated
because
you refuse to defend
the rights of your boys
to have their home
and a place of their own.
I am frustrated
because
after nine years
your spine
is still
non existent.

Madonna

A friend let me borrow Madonna's CD ' Confessions on a Dancefloor' yesterday and I am sold. Tracks 1,2 and 3 are so upbeat and clubbish that I couldn't help but smile. As I am typing this I am bopping my head to track 1. It feels good and gives you strength to speak up for whatever is going on in your life. Go ahead Madonna! "Time goes by... so slowly"

Blossoming

Haa. Whenever new changes come about they are always perceived as being bad. Why does change have to be bad? That is how we grow, learn and move towards progress. It took me a long time to accept change in my life and now I embrace it. I love it because when I am changing that means I am not stagnant. I am learning. I am advancing, moving towards my cottony clouds...

Moving Up

Scraped knees,
bruised soul
crying spirit.
I keep going.
Tear stained cheeks
and blurred vision.
But I keep going.
Self-doubt and sadness,
fading friends and endings
but I keep going...

Talkative people

I am feeling a little anxious right now. The production team at the publishing company has begun the work on my book. I am currently waiting for my copyright application to be processed. I am grateful for all of the blessings I am receiving right now.

Thank You

My sleepy eyes have opened
my dreams are dancing free
swirling around
my imagination
whispering to me.
Some of them are wide
like the deep blue sea
others are small
just right for me.
I want to thank you Lord
for the blessings you give,
the friends you gave
the love I live.
Thank you for the talents
and gifts within
that I openly share
again and again.
Thank you for my boys
energetic and bright
when I feel down
their smiles give me light.
Thank you for keeping me,
when my times were hard,
making way for your light to shine
bright like a star.
Thank You.

Changes

I feel mentally drained. Between work, my children, and working on my personal goals I feel completely drained. I know all of this sacrificing will pay off in the long run but I need rest and I feel like I can't stop. It feels like if I stop now then everything will fall apart and I won't let that happen. I have worked too hard to let it fall apart. I have to see it through to the end.

Attitude Adjustments

Well, based on the title of this entry you can pretty much guess how my last few days have been going. I am trying to rid my inner circle of people who react to everything the way children do. I thought that when you become grown up you take care of business like a grown up. Instead I am encountering people who always try to change your mind if you don't see things their way. I am not saying that I am immune to this tantrum disease, I become afflicted with it from time to time, but it is annoying and very emotionally draining when someone does it all the time. Speaking of being emotionally drained, there isn't much emotion left in me to drain... (smile full of novacaine). Some days I feel like the Joker from Batman (Jack Nicholson Joker). A fake smile permanently plastered on my face, yuk!

On to brighter things...
The publisher has received my info for the press release (mild applause) and I am waiting on word for what comes next. I am excited. Also I have begun to look into voice training, I think public speaking will thrust itself into my realm of activities pretty soon so I better be prepared. There are so many things going on with me so far this year and that is how I want to keep it. Positive things surrounding me so I can surround my sons with it like a blanket.

Protect

For you I will
provide
and guide,
surprise
and bring light
into your little world;

Emotional Tailspin

I am realizing this morning that the reality that my poetry will be published this year hasn't completely sunk in yet. I have shared the good news with family, friends and past teachers but the reality of it hasn't hit me yet. Or maybe it started to and I haven't realized that. I have started to truly analyze the last 9 years of my life and although I wish I could change alot of the occurences I am also grateful for them. Had it not been for all of the hardships I have gone through the words that are enroute to a publishing house would not exist at all. I thank the Creator for bringing me through thus far and opening a path for me to continue because my work here is far from complete...

Flashbacks

Have you ever gone back to your childhood to revisit old friends? That nostalgic feeling that almost makes you forget why you moved so far away in the first place. I had returned to my roots to recover my nephew because school let out early and I figured I would stop in to visit one of my most influential teachers from my childhood, Ms. DeBrow. She was my 5th grade teacher and she pushed me harder than any other teacher I'd ever had thus far. It helped that she had already taught both of my older brothers and my older sister long before I had stepped my foot across her door (she went on to teach my nephew - talk about making it a family affair). I graduated from her class 16 years ago this coming June. When I stopped in she was pleasantly surprised to see me. I gave her an update on my children, my nieces and my nephew. Walking down those long hallways yesterday reminded me how much of an affect the events in childhood has on a person but also showed me that you can choose not to become bitter about it. I may not be exactly where I would like to be right now, but I am definitely on the right path. So I will keep traveling and gathering companions along the way because nobody should have to travel the successful road alone. I will strive to always keep a traveling buddy with me...

My first knitted halter...

Whenever things get extremely hairy and poetry isn't my cure all I pick up a set of needles and my favorite color of yarn and tra-la-la-la-la along until I chase the blues away. Then again if I might do it just because...

A little more...

Now that we have the basics out of the way I will reveal a little more about myself. I have three beautiful sons ages: 6 and 3 years old (yes - I have a set of twins, they are three). It was only natural for me to begin writing on a regular basis. The pregnancy itself (raging hormones and abundant cravings) still has me reeling. I haven't been able to fully describe the experience in words but when they come to me I will share them. I began poetically expressing myself in 2002 when my twin boys were merely 6 months old. My poetry, even now, mostly expresses the emotions behind my romantic entanglements. It took me two years to feel confident enough to start the journey of sharing my work with everyone. Actually writing the words gave me courage to face my pain and work through it. This is where I should say I hope you enjoy my book when it is released but I'm not. I know that somewhere my poetry will help someone heal, make someone cry or quietly rejoice in realizing they love someone dearly and then my purpose for publishing my poetry will be fulfilled.

The Births

Erratic emotions
surging through me
when conception is complete.
Worries and concerns
filling my waking and sleeping hours.
Swollen,
I stare at my ever expanding belly
in amazement
realizing that life is growing
within me.
This new person inside
sharing my most intimate moments
growing as I glow with luminant life.
This person
accepting me,
trusting that I will protect and nurture him
always.
Fully dependent on me
to perform this important duty
of bringing him into existence.
Raging waters of my placenta
signals the impending task
that I have been prepared for.
Mind blowing pain
reminds me of the commitment
made to this tiny person inside,
the promise elicited in our private moments.
As the contractions
roll through me like tidal waves
a tear slides down my cheek
as the realization that my companion
for the last 9 months
is leaving,
entering his own space,
and I am heartbroken.

Happy New Year!

Well, this is the perfect time for new beginnings.
Let me introduce myself. I am Markisha, born and raised in Philadelphia, PA. I write poetry and was just signed to Publish America. I am starting the year with the creation of my first collection of poems entitled Entangled Hearts due out later this year. I began writing to release built up stress. Never in my wildest dreams did I think I would have as many poems written as I do now (300+). My main source of inspiration comes from lessons learned in past relationships. Some good, some bad and some can only be expressed through poetry:

Saying goodbye is the hardest
when true love never dies;
it grows and expands
as time passes by
awaiting the moment
to reunite...