Poetically Wyld

Poetic? yes. Wyld? maybe.

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Location: Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, United States

An Aquarius...

Saturday, May 30, 2015

Lead Based Therapy Comforts Me...

Stress, panic, you name it I've got it. A research paper, my job, and life is collectively crowding my mental space. I don't have a new outlet to release all of this pent up energy and I feel myself reaching my maximum when I am ready to cut and run. I don't like that feeling. I have had enough of that bullshit to last me the rest of my days. I am not going into 2009 with lingering remnants of the dumb shit from the last ten years. Not one solitaire drop of it will follow me into the new year. That is why I am writing it like this, to release it.

Scared of Lonely
Crying tears of hurt that refuse to leave,
Scars of fights linger past that refuse to heal.
My legs are tired from running,
From my past, present and future
For fear of repeating past mistakes and missing future opportunities.
Walls all around me
Threatening to close me in
Tightening the encasement I see
Above, in front, behind, below…
I’m scared of lonely
Lost in my thoughts of not recovering
From that long ago
That held me in captivity,
That long ago that blocked my breathing,
Off in the distance I hear
The subtle beat of
The drums,
My drums,
In the distance.
The drums spur me, although
I’m scared of lonely
In the dark the tears pour
Racing from my eyes
In time with my thoughts,
Racing against the fears that appear under the cover of night
The fears that drive me to keep moving
To keep racing
To keep trying
Yet no one sees deep enough
Far enough
Or long enough
To see…
I’m scared,
Scared to reach out,
Scared to isolate
Scared to retreat
Scared to run forward
Scared of lonely…


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